My dear reader, Happiness is meant to be experienced; sadness is meant to be written, and read. Maybe it’s my inner Russian cynic or hopeless romantic, but I find it dauntingly difficult to write when I’m happy. There is something about defining happy feelings into words, that seems like defying happiness in itself. In most cases, I would reserve writing to my moments of despair. Filling up notebooks with my fears, sharing my sorrows on Instagram stories, or scrabbling my sadness on the notes app; misery truly loves (written) company. The sole fact of knowing I could express my emotions on (digital) paper made me feel like they were valid, and that my experiences were valid too. Or even more so, that me, existing as an emotive human being in this often inherently inexplicable world, was valid.View Post
The start of the new year is commonly used as an opportunity to reflect on the year you had, and to set goals for the next. Even though I believe self-reflection should be practiced regularly – asking yourself: “Are the actions I fill my life with serving me? Are happiness and content part of my every day? What could I change for me to feel fulfilled?” are simple questions to incorporate into your daily routine – I do find my annual end-of-the-year reflection to hold special sentiment. When self-reflecting about 2020, it’s important to take into account this year was an incredibly turbulent year for everybody. Be compassionate, and kind when looking back at your achievements. The most important thing is that you survived this year – you should be proud of that. I’m excited to close this chapter for good, and start a brand new page for my new goals in 2021. If you’re curious if I achieved the goals I set for myself this year, and what my new goals are for 2021, this blog post is for you.View Post
At the end of every year, I dedicate a blog post to the life lessons I’ve learned in the past 12 months. Even though this has become a familiar routine for me, writing this annual recap felt as different as my go-to outfits recently. Sneakers and loungewear have replaced my usual heels and blazers. I have worn my everyday pair of jeans a hand full of times. My beloved designer handbags have been collecting dust on their dedicated shelves. 2020 managed to turn everything upside down and make day-to-day normalcy feel like something from a romanticized past life. So damn, what a year 2020 has been. It was supposed to be the best chapter of my life. Having a fascination for numerology, 2020 seemed like the perfect numerological year – especially for someone born on 10/10. Instead, this year became one of the toughest challenges I’ve faced. Looking back at everything that happened has made me shed some tears. I have not felt this much anxiety, loneliness & sadness since battling depression in high school, a dark chapter I’m not particularly eager to revisit. 2020 was a tough teacher, and her strict methods and hard wake-up calls will be remembered forever. But it is that often these tough moments end up teaching us the most valuable of lessons. Now more than ever will this annual recap work as a personal catharsis. I am letting go of the pain that 2020 has caused, and only taking the life lessons with me to the next year. So let’s revisit this dark chapter for the last time, and reflect on the wisdom it has taught me, together.View Post
I never believed in the law of attraction this generation holds so dearly. I grew up believing in a different concept. The concept that what comes up, must come down again. The idea of life being both good and bad; yin and yang.
You cannot receive something from life without it taking away something from you as well. If you try to win without losing, you are trying to cheat life. Even the best cheater can’t out-cheat life, or rather death, itself.View Post
“Lilia, how are you doing?” It is often the case that the simplest of questions are the hardest to answer. This question a few of you asked me on my Instagram stories inspired me to write this blogpost about feeling lost & finding yourself again. If you follow me on my other social media platforms, you will know that I’ve been feeling lost the past few weeks. With everything that’s going on in the world, as well as my personal life, I found myself questioning who I am, what I want, and where I am headed. The scary part wasn’t asking myself these questions; it was that for the first time in my life, I was not able to answer them.View Post